she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
