i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
