She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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