it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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