Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
