ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
