dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
