don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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