Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Randomize
