ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
