It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
