i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
