I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
