OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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