I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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