You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
