YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize