Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
