go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Randomize