He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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