like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
