No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
my poor anus
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Someone signed my nipple.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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