I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
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