He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
