is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
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