i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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