nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
