I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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