So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize