I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
