idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
His nipple licking is glorious
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