he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
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