It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
We're too hungover to prance.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
