Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
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