I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Randomize
