Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(703): View more from Virginia

I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.

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(334): View more from Alabama

She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.

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(228): View more from Mississippi

She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly

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(954): View more from Florida

8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.

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(518): View more from New York

I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.

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(616): View more from Michigan

I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...

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(203): View more from Connecticut

But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad

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(727): View more from Florida

He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.

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(709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.

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