it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Randomize
