are you still at the devil's house?
I heard we made out
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
