Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
