if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Randomize
