Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
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