If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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