why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
