I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Randomize
