I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
