just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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