I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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