his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
