idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
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