i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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